What about the men?
When I started research and planning for Cardigan Associates, one of my first contacts was with some wonderful mentors through the organization SCORE. I pitched my idea of a career coaching business for women, and they said: "What about the men? Will you help men if they ask?" I said yes, of course, but my main focus is on women because it's still women who predominantly take time out for caregiving, it's still women more than men sidelined by the pandemic, and it's still women who often feel less confident in the job search, especially in things like negotiating. So, while Cardigan Associates' focus is squarely on women, I want to spend a moment on men.
More and more, there are men who get it. Maybe some, like my son who puts the word "associates" in this business name, grew up with a mom who did a lot of different things. Women's paths, by choice or by chance, are often not that linear. Our kids may have watched their moms navigate a world that punishes women for being not enough or for being too much. Even the term "working mom" is a challenge. When was the last time you saw a mom home with children and she wasn't "working" doing that? The stereotypes aren't kind, and our general denigration of caregiving is widespread. When I was home with my son, I'm sure there were times when I said about myself that I was "just" a stay-at-home mom. The truth is that caregiving is hard, working for pay is hard, and doing both is hard.
Besides our children seeing our own circuitous paths, there are business leaders now — many of them men — who are showing by word and deed that they understand, too. Take, for example, the CEO of a financial firm who spoke up about hiring moms who return to the paid workforce. In a discussion about the search for talent, he said: "Mainstream recruiters have a narrow view. I hire moms who haven't worked in 20 years. We say, ‘Let’s give this two years, we’ll train you on Excel and what you need to know.’ It’s a gold mine of talent.” I didn't know him, but I thanked him publicly for understanding this under-resourced talent pool.
Finally, there's the leadership of Slalom, a new-to-Maine global consulting firm. I’m connected with two C-suite leaders — both men. If you know anything about Slalom, you know that their brand is everything. They hire outstanding talent, have created a great company culture, and have received the accolades to prove it. The leaders I spoke with recently underscored the need to look for talent in many places, not always the traditional ones. They support Cardigan Associates’ focus on women returning to paid work. As one of them said, there are women who have great skills who took some time off to care for kids and now they are terrified as they think about returning to professional life.
So, let's lift up the men and women leaders who recognize that taking time out for caregiving is an effort that requires skill, strength, wisdom, heart, and no small amount of courage. They understand that penalizing someone who has taken time out for caregiving only deprives all of us of the benefit of having a mom, a daughter, a sister, a caring human as part of our professional teams.
