Show up
When my son graduated from high school and was leaving home to go to college, I gave him a sort-of poem. I called it 25. It's 25 words that I (aspire to) live by. He was launching, and it felt like one last time to share with him the values I hoped I had imparted. The first two words in that list of 25: show up.*
Show up usually applies to what I do and how I act: a reminder to stay present and to follow through on my commitments. Lately, I've been thinking about these words in a couple of different ways: how we show up for ourselves and how community organizations and employers show up for the people who matter to them.
Showing up for ourselves means prioritizing self-care, and not in a self-indulgent or narcissistic way. Getting good sleep is essential self-care, and the people I see and know who are most sleep-deprived are caregivers — moms, adult children of elderly parents, front line workers. There's no magic way to prioritize sleep when you are stretched thin, but if you need a reminder that sleep matters, consider this that reminder.
Showing up as a community organization makes me think of Birthroots, an organization Cardigan Associates supports here in Maine. Maybe you have something similar in your community? I didn't live here when I was a new parent, but I wish I had found such a fantastic parenting and family support organization when my son was young. In Birthroots' own words, they are "a non-profit providing community based education and support focused on pregnancy through the early years of parenting. Our classes and events emphasize instinct and intuition, while addressing the social, emotional, and non-clinical needs of new parents."
Showing up as an employer means identifying needs and meeting them, not just with the product or service you sell, but with your culture and employee benefits. Look for that kind of employer for yourself — one that values families by having generous paid leave policies; one that prioritizes mental health as well as physical health by having mental health care benefits and allowing generous time off; and one that understands flexibility is the most important thing they can offer.
So, yes, show up in the typical sense (don't blow off the interview or the Zoom chat), but perhaps think of showing up in these other ways, too. I promise to show up for you.
* Most days, these 25 words to live by are aspirational, at best, for me, but they always keep me centered. Show up. When it's your turn, take it. Choose wisely. Forgive yourself. Forgive others. Keep a grateful heart. Let love be your guide. Fear not.
